OK, Bubba, just because you're a man, you do not have the right to pull up next to me as I walk through a parking lot, roll down your window, and tell me I have "nice shape to me." Where exactly did you learn that this behavior was welcome or flattering to a lady?!?
And to Bubba #2, I'm very sorry that I did not make a left out of said parking lot fast enough for you. There was another car turning into the same lot and I couldn't see around her because her car was bigger than mine. I think a wreck would totally ruin my day (and hers) so I decided to wait instead and pull out safely. If you were late to your beer pong tournament appointment because you had to wait two seconds for me, I'm sorry, but it was still rude of you to peel out around me and give me a dirty look and then cut off several other cars who were coming down the same street you and I were turning on to...
And last, but not least, to Truck Driver Bubba #3, I'm sure you are a badass, driving your big 18-wheeler millions of miles a day, and I'm sure you think you're the king of the road because you're bigger than everyone else. But your semi's get-up-and-go isn't quite the same as my Mazda's, so kindly stay out of the fast lane unless you're passing someone else...and when you're done passing Granny, please return to your rightful place in the right lane. Thanks ever so much, Sugar!
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