Paulette Bunion

Yes, Dear Readers, I know I spelled Mr. Bunyan's last name wrong. That is because I have four, yes four bunions! Actually, to be medically correct, I have two bunions and two bunionettes. You see, bunions are bone protrusions on the medial (inside) portion of the foot, by your big toe. Bunionettes, on the other hand, are on the lateral (outside) portion, by your pinky toe. They are the result of a splaying of the metatarsals (the five foot bones that connect your toe bones to your ankles). This splaying is what causes the bones to protrude as the phalanges (toes) attempt to remain in place. Left without surgery, the outer toes will eventually regress inward and under the adjacent toe (in other words, the big toe would point inward and eventually go underneath the second toe, likewise with the pinky and fourth toe).

Yes, bunions can be caused by excessive squeezing of the toes into pointy shoes and high heels, but, as you might know, bunions are also hereditary. My mom has them (well, had; she had four removed about 12 years ago). Her mom has them. And even her mom had them! So I was not surprised a few years ago, when I started to notice the bones on the sides of my feet begin to protrude. Sure, they hurt a little while I was Active Duty on Sea Duty (steel-toed boots plus steel decks are not good on the feet), but it wasn't constant, and it certainly didn't preclude me from doing anything like run or wear my beloved high heels. That is, however, until recently, when I was forced back into steel-toed boots for a week of Reserve duty. By the end of the day, I could barely drive home due to the throbbing pain in my feet. And when I did manage to get home and yank those darned boots off, my feet were purple (just where the bunions are, not all over) and it hurt just to walk barefoot for several hours!!

So I made an appointment with a pediatrist. He took several X-rays of my feet, from every angle imaginable, took one look, and affirmed that I do, in fact, have bunions. And I do need to have them removed. Soon. The surgery will consist of breaking my feet in the affected areas, shaving/cutting away the extra bone and reshaping the area, and securing the bones in the proper places with titanium pins or screws. It's outpatient surgery, so I'll go in in the morning, and be home by dinner time. According to the doctor, I won't be able to walk or drive for a couple of weeks, and it'll be several more before I can hop back on the treadmill. For that reason, he likes to only do one foot at a time, giving me a total recovery time of around eight months.

I, however, have other ideas. My mom had all four done at once. She also had very little pain, so was walking the next day and driving very shortly after that. I am hoping to be able to talk my surgeon into doing all four of mine on the same day as well, and taking my chances with the pain. After all, when I had my (totally impacted) wisdom teeth removed, they told me I wouldn't be able to eat solids for ten days; I ate pizza and popcorn the following night. And I only took one dose of the codeine. Simply put, I do not want to be laid up for nearly a year, nor can I deal with that much down time because of nursing school! The director of my program is willing to work with me now, since we're not into the clinical portion yet, but missing clinical rotations in the spring due to a second surgery is out of the question. So, we'll see. Either I'll manage to get all four done now, or I'll get two now and worry about the other foot another time, probably in a couple of years. Regardless, I'm fairly certain my threshold for pain will mirror that of my mother's, and I'll be totally fine. Stay in touch, though, as I'm sure I'll use this blog to chronicle the whole process!!