Changes

Hey There!!

Change is a scary thing, but it's also necessary.  And as scary as it can be, it's not a bad thing.  I have to keep reminding myself of this because in the very near future, there's gonna be a butt-ton of change going on around here.  It's all for the best, and I truly think that in my heart it's what I want, but it's still scary.

First of all, you might have noticed a very slight layout change in my blog.  A while ago I mentioned that I was considering shutting this bad-boy down.  For now, I've decided that I'll keep it up, as best I can, as a way to chronicle my children's lives.  I would like to weed through some of the posts and remove those that I wouldn't want certain people to see so that I can publish this blog to my family.  We'll see how that goes.  Sometimes I like that I have an outlet to put things out there and know that they're not looking.  Like I said, we'll see.  But for now, you might have noticed the tabs up top.  I'm trying to get things a tad more organized, for the benefit of my readers, so they can find tips on travel, food, decorating, military life, and more.  I haven't gotten far in my project, and I'm not sure how far I'll get, but there you have it.  In that same vein, I'm thinking about going through my posts and better titling those that might be of use to folks, so that a weekend trip to Gettysburg says so right there in the title, rather than "anniversary get-away" or something like that...so folks know what travel information they might receive.  Again, we'll see how that goes.

The biggest change, though, is that as of yesterday, I'm heading back to school full-time!  Way back just after Christmas I applied to George Mason University's Bachelor's of Nursing accelerated program for second degree students.  This is a 12-month full-time nursing program designed for those of us with a bachelors degree in another field.  My first degree is in Marketing, from Notre Dame.  While I'm super proud of that accomplishment, my life has taken a few unexpected turns since my college days, and that isn't helping me reach my new goals.  At any rate, because the program is limited in space, it's super competitive!  I applied, and was accepted to, the University, but the School of Nursing wait-listed me for this particular program.  I was bummed and really tried to tell myself that everything happens for a reason and if it was meant to be, I'd be taken off the wait-list.  At the same time, due to pre-requisite requirements, timing, distance, cost, and a plethora of other factors, I didn't have a back-up plan, and it was looking more and more like nursing school was just not in the cards for me.  I began applying to other jobs, focusing on my experience as a Naval officer, business degree, and tiny little bit of nursing background through my LPN program.  I'd only just sent out my resume and applied to a few things online, but no one had called me back, so that was discouraging too.

But I'm still nervous.  I'm going back to school.  In the field of my choice.  And that hopefully turns into the job, I think, of my dreams.  All that is wonderful.  But my kids will have to be in full-time day-care, which they've never done.  In fact, Buddy Man has only been under the care of a babysitter three times in his life, and even only a few times on top of those has a grandmother been taking care of him.  Sending him to "school" scares me in that I won't be with him most of the day to see all the new things he's learning...but at the same time I know there is so much he can learn by being around other kids with a structured day that focuses on his development.  I worry that I'll miss important milestones with Dutch and I won't get to see all those firsts of his!  I want to soak up every minute I have them all to myself!

On top of that, I'll be a full-time student.  Which involves homework.  I've never had to deal with homework on top of housework before.  Hubs and I will be discovering a whole new dynamic to our marriage now, and I'm anxious to see how things work out, and if things are still done in the manner I expect.

At the same time, I'll be around other people like me.  Unlike my LPN program, I'll be surrounded by people who already have a degree and are just looking for a career change.  Presumably I'll be around people closer to my age.  Obviously we'll share an interest in healthcare and nursing.  I'm hoping that translates into building relationships and making new friends, something I've been desperate for for some time now.  Actually, I haven't felt like I've had that connection with people since my first ship, which I left in 2007.  After that I was either the only female officer, the only unmarried person, the youngest, the one with the most education, or something like that.  I'm hoping to meet some people that I'll enjoy spending time with outside of the classroom/hospital as much as I do inside.  That we can form a book club, or Bunko group, or something like that.

And, this time next year, we'll hopefully be celebrating my graduation, I'll be preparing for and passing the state boards, and I'll be gearing up for a new job.  There's a brand new hospital being built just down the road from me and it would be fabulous to get a job there.  Nursing full-time is really just three days a week, so I'll still have some days at home to run errands and spend time with my boys, which is a huge plus for me.  I'll have the "independence" I've craved since I left the Navy.  Not that I want to distance myself from my husband, but I miss having money that I earned.  I miss not having to ask him for money when the grocery bill is higher than normal.  I miss being able to go on a shopping spree when I want, and not feeling bad about spending a few hundred dollars on new clothes.

So that is the plan.  That's the big change.  That's the good news.  School for a year, pass the state boards by the end of next summer, get a job as a labor and delivery nurse (hopefully in a hospital close to my house), get some experience.  After a few years, if I'm still loving the job, I'll likely begin exploring options for a Masters degree to become a Certified Nurse Midwife.  But let's just take things one day at a time, shall we?